Tag Archives: poem

Two Years

Two years

of repeated tears.

 

I see your face

in another place.

 

A life ends:

every day blends

into another

to smother

effusions,

the harsh intrusions

of reality and death

that suck our breath.

 

We grieve,

we peeve.

 

Nothing brings you back

from the crack

of elusiveness,

the conclusiveness

of death.

 

One’s last breath

is the ultimate

not the penultimate;

it’s the finality,

the banality.

 

I act strong

though I long

to race

and not face

another day

of grey;

I’d end the song

were I that strong.

 

Hearts don’t always heal.

 

We can’t always kneel

to pray,

to produce a ray

of sunshine

to aid a wilting vine.

 

Stems strive

to thrive,

but all good things die

no matter how well they fly.

 

And so it was with you,

my son, who grew

but only to thirty-six.

 

Your heart not to fix,

your death to come

while we were numb,

unaware and

unable to swear

because the end

did transcend

rosy illusions

and delusions

that you’d remain

to forever reign

in life

without strife.

 

Instead it’s us

in this life

of strife.

 

We cuss

and cry

and ask why

you had to go

instead of grow.

 

Matthew

 

Rest in Peace, my Sweet Son.

I miss you with each breath

and still can’t believe you’re not here.

April 28, 1980-March 11, 2017

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The Spot Writers – “A Mid-Winter Night’s Dream,” by Chiara De Giorgi

Welcome to The Spot Writers.

This month’s prompt is to write a story including the words, “Will winter never end.”

This week’s story comes from Chiara De Giorgi. Chiara dreams, reads, edits texts, translates, and occasionally writes in two languages. She also has a lot of fun.

 ***

A Midwinter Night’s Dream by Chiara De Giorgi

 

Through the forest I did go

Tallest trees covered in snow

All was silent, all was white

Soft and crunchy, left and right.

Up above the sky was blue

And the sparkly stars in view

 

Promised love, and magic, too.

 

Love and magic? Don’t believe

All your heart wants to perceive!

Winter stars are left alone,

All the fairies are long gone

And the woods will just pretend

That white ice is good a friend.

 

Oh, will winter never end?

 

Don’t despair, this frosted season

Has a secret, cheerful reason:

Life beneath this blanket pearly

Hides and shies from all that’s earthly

Until spring returns anew.

This can I reveal to you:

 

Fairies dance on snowflakes, too.

 

My dear friend, you give me hope!

I’ll see flowers on this slope

Thousand colors, buzzing bees

The green magic of the trees

Sweetest nights, warm air, and moon

Dancing fairies, charming tune

 

Spring will be back very soon!

 

***

The Spot Writers—Our Members:

Val Muller: http://www.valmuller.com/blog/

Catherine A. MacKenzie: https://writingwicket.wordpress.com/wicker-chitter/

Phil Yeats: https://alankemisterauthor.wordpress.com

Chiara De Giorgi: https://chiaradegiorgi.blogspot.com/

+++
C.A. MacKenzie is the author of (among other books) the novel WOLVES DON’T KNOCK, a psychological drama/thriller, available from the author or at various retailers including Amazon [https://www.amazon.com/Wolves-Dont-Knock-C-MacKenzie/dp/1927529387/].

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The Two Births of Jesus

The Two Births of Jesus
by C.A. MacKenzie

According to Matthew’s gospel:
Joseph had a dream
that Jesus, his son, was to be born.
In Jerusalem amongst a thorne,
there were three magi—
three wise men who would care—
who came from the East somewhere,
who saw a star to gleam
and knew Jesus was there.
The three magi followed the star so bright
to Bethlehem that night,
coming with gifts to give the son,
gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.
Falling in love with a Jesus so young
and scared of the future to come,
the magi did not tarry
but left to go back home.
And an angel did come to Joseph and Mary,
telling them to flee that land,
to avoid the danger to come from afar,
and so off to Egypt they ran.

Luke gave another story:
Of Gabriel, the angel of God,
who was the spirit of truth
and a messenger from God,
telling Mary she will have a son,
her son to be named Jesus.
Mary and Joseph leave Nazareth town (in Galilee)
to travel to Bethlehem, Joseph’s ancestral home.
Mary and Joseph, they did roam
but could not find a place to stay
before the baby was born that day.
And after his birth
in a manger the babe to lay.
And in another place, far away,
an angel of the Lord came down
to the shepherds in the field on earth
who were caring for their flock.
The angel brought them news of a birth,
news of such great joy,
of the birth of Jesus, a baby boy.
Said they would find him wrapped in bands of cloth
and laying in a manger trough.
And after the angel spoke the words to savour,
came down a Heavenly Host from above
who said in a voice of love:
“Glory to God in the highest Heaven
and on earth peace
amongst those whom he favours.”
The shepherds hurry to Bethlehem,
for Jesus they want to see,
and to Mary and Joseph they tell
the story that the angel did tell to them.
The shepherds then return to their flocks,
and Mary and Joseph left as well
to return home to their Nazareth.

And that is how Jesus was born that day.

 © C.A. MacKenzie (written many years ago)

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE!

I wish everyone peace, joy, and love.


+++

C.A. MacKenzie is the author of (among other books) the novel WOLVES DON’T KNOCK, a psychological drama/thriller, available from the author or at various retailers including Amazon [https://www.amazon.com/Wolves-Dont-Knock-C-MacKenzie/dp/1927529387/].

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July 11 – Sixteen Months

Heart is brokenfix

A piece of my heart ripped from my soul
Sixteen months ago,
Since then so many cliches of life and death
And sometimes there are no words,
No white, no black,
Just mucky grey between masses of nothing.

We honour you in death as we never did in life,
But isn’t that the way of humans—
Not missing something until it’s gone,
Withholding words until it’s too late.

I’d give all my next heartbeats to
Hug you one last time,
To tell you “I love you” in case you didn’t know
Because no one can hear those words enough,
I’d ask for forgiveness for my wrongs,
For not being perfect,
But throughout your thirty-six years
I tried my best,
But still, I could have done more.
We can all do more.

Balloons don’t go to Heaven
And though lovely
With colourful meaning and love,
That rubbery sheath
Harms the environment.
We need to protect our future
As I couldn’t protect yours,
A mama can only do so much,
Which I did not know until your death.

I tried so hard to save you,
But could I have done more?
Though my heart says otherwise
My mind screeches NO!
The word “incurable” exists
And I don’t know why,
Prayers, doctors, money…
Nothing could save you.

I’ll grieve every day with that
Empty hole in my heart,
That missing fragment I live without,
For I still breathe and function,
I still eat and drink and play
But I’m not whole.
My heart can never be repaired.
No amount of thread or glue can help.
Not even tissues can dry all my tears.
Nothing can bring you back.
Nothing.

I’m not sure of my beliefs,
What my future holds after I’m gone.
Will we meet again?
I’m sorry to waver,
To not fully believe,
I’m like my father who opined that
Once we’re gone, we’re gone, and
Nothing remains but stone or ash.

But forever and always:
There are whispers in the wind,
Rustling through the trees,
Birds chirping,
Deer scampering across the field.
Perhaps it’s you, calling out.

I think of you too often,
Wondering where you are
In this game of life and death.
Within this vast landscape of living
Where does life end and death begin?
When does death end?

My son, my son,
These are words I could never imagine
saying, writing, or thinking.
Who could ever predict this loss?
Not I.
And now I ponder the future
And other wretched events that linger,
For if your death occurred, nothing is sacred
and more loss surely waits,
Waiting like the moon to rise or the sun to set,
For no one is immune to life and death.

We all have our beginnings and our endings,
And, oh, how horrid the endings.

 

Matt candle crop

 

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The Year of Firsts

The Year of Firsts

Matt candle crop

The year of firsts ends today,

What is this current year?

A year of seconds?

Is there a label for future years?

 

How did a year pass so fast

And yet so painfully slow?

I relived each day—

Three hundred and sixty-five.

 

Not wanting to remember,

Not wanting to forget

You walking through the door,

Your smile betraying antics.

 

We mucked with Mother Nature.

Did we do too much?

Did we do too little?

Guilt consumes my soul.

 

Flowers withered, trinkets exist,

Photos and memories abound,

Remains encased in silver or bronze

And within a wooden tomb.

 

A headstone highlights your grave,

Sun dancing upon blue and grey,

But you are as scattered and hidden

As your cans of empty beer.

 

Nine months I carried you,

Today I carry you ‘round my neck

And within my heart and mind,

Your death etched upon my face.

 

The first horrid year ends today

But every breath brings more,

You’ll remain an eternal mirage,

Forever unreachable until I die.

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Ten Months

January 11: Ten Months
 
What’s ten months?
Ten months could be any time length:
A lifetime or one day,
A yesterday or a tomorrow,
A today that never ends,
Or a moment frozen in time.
 
Not the same as nine or twelve,
Less than eleven
That will soon arrive.
 
Eleven is notable:
The eleventh day of every month
I commemorate you.
 
But what is ten?
Just ten long, unfathomable months
Since you’ve been gone,
Since you died—
Not passed away or passed on
But died—
Dead and buried died.
 
Ten months of grief,
Two months short a year.
 
My life has changed,
Irrevocably, forever,
But I’ll never forget you.
 
My middle child, my son,
Life isn’t the same without you,
My heart is a hole
That overflows with tears,
An endless pit of ache,
A vacuum of void.
.Matt candle cropUrn

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A Poem of Threes

A mother never expects one of her children to die. Never.

It happened to me.

Three months after the first symptom (which was hardly any symptom at all, really), less than three months after a diagnosis, my son was gone. The nightmare is replayed before me, every day, over and over. I can’t think about him without tearing up, but I don’t want to forget him. I want to remember him, but I’m sick of my tears.

Today, it’s been six months since he left us. Where have the days gone? It seems like yesterday, when too many of us surrounded his hospital bedside, but it also feels like a distant memory, a nightmare, one I never awake from.

There is so much more I want to write, but I can’t. I just can’t.

Poems are therapeutic.

***

A Poem of Threes

Six months ago today—

Nine months ago—

My life changed.

 

9/11,

Irma,Kattia,Jose.

Is my loss greater?

 

Feng Shui:

Fuk, Luk, and Sau,

Long life, fame, fortune.

 

Three-legged toad,

Three wise men,

Three immortals.

 

Three’s company,

Father, Son, Holy Ghost,

Tall, dark, handsome.

 

Rules of threes.

Odds better than evens:

Good things come in threes.

 

But odds beat you:

The Big C.

Despite three hearts.

 

Rules are meant to be broken,

But rules shouldn’t break—

Not at thirty-six.

 

Birth, life, death,

Two loving children

Plus one at rest.

Matt candle crop

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The Spot Writers – “reflection” by Cathy MacKenzie

Welcome to the Spot Writers. This month’s prompt was to look out the window and write about what was out there.

Today’s post comes to us from Cathy MacKenzie. Through her nanoscopic publishing company MacKenzie Publishing (nanoscopic is a thousand times smaller than microscopic, but, hey, everyone knows smaller is better, to steal a phrase from a fellow writer), will be presenting her first anthology, OUT OF THE CAVE, 21 tales for youth 13+, by 21 authors. The book will be available on August 1, 2016, from Amazon, in print and e-book, as well as at other venues.

***

reflection

tap tap tap

face looks back at me

tap tap tap

I turn

tap

she turns

tap

fingers slender

tap tap

fingers stubby

tap tap

face stares

hoary, haggard

face moves

bright, blissful

tap tap

tap tap

she taps

I tap

shadow on the lens

behind the frame

weary and worn

tap tap

you sigh

I sigh

a life done, gone

tap tap tap

***

The Spot Writers—Our Members:

RC Bonitz: www.rcbonitz.com

Val Muller: http://www.valmuller.com/blog/

Catherine A. MacKenzie: https://writingwicket.wordpress.com/wicker-chitter/

Tom Robson: https://robsonswritings.wordpress.com

 

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The Spot Writers – “The Sunflower,” by Cathy MacKenzie

Welcome to the Spot Writers. The prompt for this month is “spring flowers.” This poem comes from Cathy MacKenzie (an old poem from her “archives” since she forgot about writing something new for today). Check out her website at the bottom of the post.

***

The Sunflower

The fragile crayon picked, a soft pastel,
Out of the waiting tray of rainbow shades,
Brushed onto the outline a sunshine belle,
With grace and form, subtle beauty cascades.

The loving smoothness massaged in the light,
Gives birth to a once-pale flower,
Blossoming into a beaming yellow bright,
Its hidden root grasping so much power.

How stunning, she says to the mirror,
Its sturdy stalk rising high to the sun,
The seeds she’ll scatter, growing dearer,
Buds bursting forth, living has begun.

Later…

She snatches the fragment, the broken end,
Posing naked beside her in the looming tray,
The pastel crayon, stiff, unable to bend,
Breaks easily, shades of betraying grey.

The scratching of the jaundiced piece
Scrapes across the outline as she mourns,
Covering the smudged paper, hiding a crease,
While a brighter one laughs and scorns.

The sickly pallor on the leaves do wave,
Colouring the roughness, the grain peeking,
Applied like a shovel attacking a grave,
The wilted sunflower leering and weeping.

 

***

The Spot Writers–our members:

 RC Bonitz: rcbonitz.com

Val Muller: http://www.valmuller.com/blog/

Catherine A. MacKenzie:https://writingwicket.wordpress.com/wicker-chitter/

Tom Robson: https://robsonswritings.wordpress.com/

 

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The Seamstress

Mom

 

(In memory of my dear, sweet mother, 1927-2016)

 

My mother holds the tangled threads

of her five children

gathered in her frail hands,

now adults, all of us,

grown,

yet her babies still,

siblings once woven so tightly.

 

She clutches the flimsy threads

delicately,

not wanting them to break,

but she knows when her time is done

the stitches,

almost brittle now with age,

will pucker and snap,

unravelling

like a knitted sweater

frayed at the seams

that slowly unweaves

and shrinks in the wash.

 

The five of us,

once finely patterned

within the squares

of a cosy quilted comforter,

are now knotted differently,

we are mismatched buttons,

different lines we stitched,

different designs we embroidered,

different templates we followed.

 

We may have been pierced with needles

or cut with scissors

and discarded like scraps,

but still forever entwined,

criss-crossing like lattice

or unfolding like yards of white lace

or glistening like beaded brocade,

other times jumping through our fitted hoops,

casting each other off.

 

Sometimes we’re bold like strands of gold

and other times we hide in the folds

as we try to patch our souls.

 

We are twisted

and at odds

the five of us—

two against three,

three against two—

faded appliqués of assorted shades and sizes

torn from a worn and loving quilted spread,

smothered with pinpricks of jealousy,

looping alone

and spinning yarns

and piping warped dreams

that don’t gauze the rip

or mend the tear.

 

We’ve forgotten the wicker basket

from whence we came—

a hamper once filled with love

and accessories with which to mend—

the one the seamstress hovers over,

ever watchful and caring.

 

But in times of crises—

when pockets are picked

and seams are shattered—

we gather and braid together,

our dyes running forth again

while we weave a tapestry of colours

into a padded patchwork

that frames our mother in love.

 

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