I need a drink. Ya, I know, it’s not even three o’clock. I usually have enough willpower to last till four o’clock.

But I can’t help it. I’m pulling my hair out – as many times as I’m plugging and unplugging my Kobo to my computer, as many times as I’ve gone to Smashwords to re-download my three new books.

Soon, I’ll be bald.

And I keep waiting for Smashwords to boot me out. Surely no one can be that dumb, they must think (whoever “they” at Smashwords is). It’s a good thing a purchaser can only see and download books that are published AFTER they purchase, not before. For sure, if anyone looked at my Smashwords account and saw the hundreds of downloads (well, maybe I exaggerate a tad), they might wonder about me. “What…she’s a writer?”

Ya, I try.

I guess that’s the life of a perfectionist.

I only wish my books were perfect. I have no clue. These books are only compilations of my short stories; they’re not heavy, non-fiction, researched works. They’re just three short books (divided down from the original one larger book).They should be easy – and fun. So why am I having such a hard time?

Supposedly, I’ve done everything right. I didn’t rush and publish as soon as the stories were written. I let them rest, for months and months, and went back numerous times to re-read and edit. I have literally spent the last two weeks, night and day (no exaggeration/disgusted Hubbie can attest to this), re-reading all my stories, again and again; making covers; re-reading; editing; downloading to Smash then to my Kobo; checking formating. If you haven’t published to Smash before, you don’t have a clue how much work all this is. And for what? Maybe thirty-eight cents for one purchase? I better sell a lot of books!

I paid for an editor, but I question some of her edits (no offense to her; I think she’s great). I’m still continually going online to check punctuation, spelling and grammar, things I thought, even after editing, that didn’t seem correct. I revamped some of my sentences to make them stronger and less confusing. And I re-read and re-read and changed and changed.

Others are giving me conflicting advice; perhaps different editors have different views. I’m more confused than ever, I think. Maybe it’s just me; I’m tired.

I’m still conflicted with my commas. I think I’m minus a few.

As well, I’m a Canadian – and proud of it! But I guess Canadian spellings stand out as misspelled words. So I had to change all those “misspellings” to U.S. versions, even though Word wasn’t too happy. I’m sure I missed a few.

I’m at the point now that I’m totally sick of these stories. I just want to be done with them. Get them up on Smash and move on.

But I don’t want to have trash out there. Once someone perceives you’re a bad writer, that perception will stay. And I’m a good writer, I think. (But doesn’t every writer think they’re good?) And I want to sell my works; I don’t sit at this computer all day for the fun of it!

I need to sell.

Jeepers! What’s a person to do?

Tonight, I’m going to bed early, accompanied by my Kobo (poor Hubby!). I’m going to re-read each and every story one last time. Tomorrow they will be up on Smashwords, good or bad. If I get bashed, so be it.

And now I’m going for a drink. Wine, that is! Anyone want to join me?

PS>>>Tomorrow, check out Smashwords and my new three new books:




AND, please…if you find any glaring errors, please let me know!  Gracias!


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